10. Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.
9. In the Top 40, half the songs are secret messages to the teen world to drop out, turn on, and groove with the chemicals and light shows at discotheques.
8. One of the wonderful things about going to a small college is you can get into everything.
7. Sometimes I'm asked by kids why I condemn marijuana when I haven't tried it. The greatest obstetricians in the world have never been pregnant.
6. From Kids Say The Darndest Things: Art: "Have you ever been in love?" Kid: "No, but I've been in like."
5. I stand fearlessly for small dogs, the American Flag, motherhood and the Bible. That's why people love me.
4. I've learned it's always better to have a small percentage of a big success, than a hundred percent of nothing.
3. Each generation has been an education for us in different ways. The first child-with-bloody-nose was rushed to the emergency room. The fifth child-with-bloody-nose was
told to go to the yard immediately and stop bleeding on the carpet.
2. From Kids Say The Darndest Things: Art: "Did you see Santa this year?" Kid: "See him? I fixed him a bourbon and water."
... and the #1 Art Linkletter funny quote is:
1. A finished product is one that has already seen its better days.